My REAL Profession – Relationship Specialist

Those of you who know me are probably laughing out loud while saying – “what does she know; she does not even have a man!”

This is true, but does your child psychologist have to have children? Does your divorce lawyer have to have been through a divorce? No, so why do I have to have a man to help other single mothers find the right man for them.

My new calling came to me while reading a very insightful email entitled “Is he the one”. The entire document was wonderfully written and gave great examples of how God has created a man perfect for every woman. We have all heard this before, and for those of us who are God’s children, and have faith that He does have something and someone great in store for us, hold on to His promise and try to wait patiently. But what are we really waiting for and how will we know that he is the one?

According to the following paragraph, from the email discussed above, we won’t know until he chooses us (not God, but this man who is looking for a wife):

Remember, women fall in love and get married. Men decide to get married and then look for a wife. Note the difference in order. So if a guy says he's not looking for anything serious, take his words seriously.

Ok, is that it? This reminds me of speed dating, except I just sit there and wait until he decides to get up from the table and move to the next candidate. At least with speed dating, you know right away. The worst thing is to date someone 2, 3, 5 years and then HE decides you’re not the one – WTF!!!

This next paragraph was very similar to the first, but it indicates so much more:

Trust me; the right man at the wrong time can be just as awful as the wrong man at any time. So trust God's timing in this. He is the ultimate matchmaker. Relax, sit pretty and allow yourself to be found. Again - WAIT until the man voices his intentions. He should take the lead in establishing the relationship. You may have an inkling that he is the one, but God will use the man to set the tone of the relationship. Allow him the opportunity to woo you - this is your first act of submission. Jesus set the standard for all men to follow. They should love us first. And they should lead the relationship.

What I took from this passage is this:

First, I feel like I have first hand experience of having the right man at the wrong time, and its true – that sucks worst than having the wrong man at the right time. In the back of your mind you will always wonder what it would have been like if it was the right time.

Second, what happens if you’ve been chosen by someone who is not your choice? Based on this passage, if his intentions are inline with your desires and goals and the timing is right, he should be considered your new husband. In other words his intentions and desires should lead your actions.

Well I am sorry, but I am not ok with that. But then again, I am not ok with a lot of things, so use YOUR best judgment. Men and women should be on equal playing fields – well maybe not equal – but we should not have to take whatever falls in our lap. Where is our say so in the deal? There is an answer to this question, but it is so deep that it has been reserved for a separate blog post.

Good day, and happy searching!